I distinctly remember myself when I came here. Wire rimmed, metal spectacles, anorexic in a bad way, dark circles, sunken cheeks and zero percent of what I am today. For a change, I was a quiet little child who used to sit into her room all day, reading some book, in a dark blue skirt or tunic. Now, I talk so openly its often offensive.
Here is why, I am that way.
I had always longed for a park.
Sweet, fresh air, soft grass, rides and lots and lots of friends. It was a dream. So when Papa got transferred to Kolkata, all my sadness evaporated as soon as I heard there was a park.
I didn't have many friends. I wasn't very social. Lucknow was a crowded, messed up city, where my life solely existed in trips between my grandparent's houses. It was relatives here and there, and none of the fun stuff.
I was in this really weird school, and hell, was it traumatizing. Despite having a large population, mainly consisting of Muslims, Lucknow did a lot to damage my self esteem. These girls, who believed in a different kind of God, kept saying things about what I do dirty and what I do wrong. We were very small then. I'm sure she has grown into a mature, responsible teen with an open mind, and she doesn't go around saying things like that anymore. I hope.
I often look back and regret not retorting, actually telling them how logical my religion was, the way I enlighten all my friends today. CMS Aliganj was definitely a good school in many ways, and will always be an integral part of my grooming, but I sometimes wish they had done more "to educate children and endeavor to unleash their potential" , the way it was so pompously written in the school prospectus. I wish they taught children that every individual is worth attention and thought, and people always believe for a reason, however bizarre it may be.
When I shifted into Udita, I thought I'd slip away unseen. But someone had seen me.
Anamika and her family stood there, on their doorstep, watching us. Neighbors didn't play much role in my life. They were always too annoying, excessively girly or boyish to a fault. I had no idea how much fun I would be having.
From the first day I came over to her house to the last time recently when I've watched a movie with her, both of us have changed a lot.
The the sweet little girl who used to twist the chains of a child's swing, and spin around in glee now came over to my house every single year. Now my brother was her brother. I still remember our highly awkward first Rakshabandhan. Silently tying rakhi to Jon, we then stood inches apart from each other in the lobby. Then my mom appeared from somewhere with a bag. My brother ran up to each of us, handing us something.
It was one of those giant, round lollipops. The sticky ones which never seem to end. I recall staring at all the swirly colors in terror. How will I finish that without gaining a calorie or too?
What I hadn't noticed was that Anamika had already hugged her lollipop and Jon, and was dancing with joy. She went home very happy, and I got a hug too.
She has helped me open up to a degree I would've never been able to reach. She was my first, proper friend who has fought for me, with me, laughed at me, with me, as well as being my only companion who was solemn about the injured butterflies I used to save in the park. ( I think you can guess why this paragraph is buttercup yellow)
My boldness and all I have today is because of the endless debates we have. The skill of explaining things to people,which I have been terribly arrogant about lately, is only because its so much fun to teach her things I know, and give her my easier-said-than-done advice. The only difference is that years ago it was about what dress to wear and today its about her love life.
I never thank her. I'm the kind of person who doesn't write her a tbh, or a fill in the blank thingy on Facebook, or a description. She always whines. What she doesn't know is that I'm scared people will block me from their Newsfeed after reading..... Iliad 2, probably.
Our friendship is exactly like that lollipop. That sticky, irritating sweetness keeps us together like glue, and the swirly streams of color are what each one of us has woven within it. You know the best part? Its round. It has no spiteful edges and jealous corners, and let me tell all those people who are envious of our friendship one last thing:
Its going to be a long, long time before we both finish this lollipop.
Here is why, I am that way.
I had always longed for a park.
Sweet, fresh air, soft grass, rides and lots and lots of friends. It was a dream. So when Papa got transferred to Kolkata, all my sadness evaporated as soon as I heard there was a park.
I didn't have many friends. I wasn't very social. Lucknow was a crowded, messed up city, where my life solely existed in trips between my grandparent's houses. It was relatives here and there, and none of the fun stuff.
I was in this really weird school, and hell, was it traumatizing. Despite having a large population, mainly consisting of Muslims, Lucknow did a lot to damage my self esteem. These girls, who believed in a different kind of God, kept saying things about what I do dirty and what I do wrong. We were very small then. I'm sure she has grown into a mature, responsible teen with an open mind, and she doesn't go around saying things like that anymore. I hope.
I often look back and regret not retorting, actually telling them how logical my religion was, the way I enlighten all my friends today. CMS Aliganj was definitely a good school in many ways, and will always be an integral part of my grooming, but I sometimes wish they had done more "to educate children and endeavor to unleash their potential" , the way it was so pompously written in the school prospectus. I wish they taught children that every individual is worth attention and thought, and people always believe for a reason, however bizarre it may be.
When I shifted into Udita, I thought I'd slip away unseen. But someone had seen me.
Anamika and her family stood there, on their doorstep, watching us. Neighbors didn't play much role in my life. They were always too annoying, excessively girly or boyish to a fault. I had no idea how much fun I would be having.
From the first day I came over to her house to the last time recently when I've watched a movie with her, both of us have changed a lot.
The the sweet little girl who used to twist the chains of a child's swing, and spin around in glee now came over to my house every single year. Now my brother was her brother. I still remember our highly awkward first Rakshabandhan. Silently tying rakhi to Jon, we then stood inches apart from each other in the lobby. Then my mom appeared from somewhere with a bag. My brother ran up to each of us, handing us something.
It was one of those giant, round lollipops. The sticky ones which never seem to end. I recall staring at all the swirly colors in terror. How will I finish that without gaining a calorie or too?
What I hadn't noticed was that Anamika had already hugged her lollipop and Jon, and was dancing with joy. She went home very happy, and I got a hug too.
She has helped me open up to a degree I would've never been able to reach. She was my first, proper friend who has fought for me, with me, laughed at me, with me, as well as being my only companion who was solemn about the injured butterflies I used to save in the park. ( I think you can guess why this paragraph is buttercup yellow)
My boldness and all I have today is because of the endless debates we have. The skill of explaining things to people,which I have been terribly arrogant about lately, is only because its so much fun to teach her things I know, and give her my easier-said-than-done advice. The only difference is that years ago it was about what dress to wear and today its about her love life.
I never thank her. I'm the kind of person who doesn't write her a tbh, or a fill in the blank thingy on Facebook, or a description. She always whines. What she doesn't know is that I'm scared people will block me from their Newsfeed after reading..... Iliad 2, probably.
Our friendship is exactly like that lollipop. That sticky, irritating sweetness keeps us together like glue, and the swirly streams of color are what each one of us has woven within it. You know the best part? Its round. It has no spiteful edges and jealous corners, and let me tell all those people who are envious of our friendship one last thing:
Its going to be a long, long time before we both finish this lollipop.
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